What is this emotion telling me? How anger, fear and jealousy can point the way to a better life
Rather than suppressing uncomfortable emotions through forced optimism or relying on stubborn grit, experts increasingly advocate for psychological flexibility—the capacity to acknowledge difficult feelings and treat them as constructive feedback. While societal messaging often pressures people to maintain constant positivity, studies link higher psychological flexibility to superior mental health, showing that accepting unpleasant emotions like anger, fear, and jealousy helps people take constructive action rather than retreating into avoidance.
According to behavioural scientist Rachael Skews, a specialist in acceptance and commitment therapy, the skill relies on three core elements: engaging with personal priorities, staying present in the moment, and remaining open to learning from whatever unfolds. Practical applications demonstrate how this mindset resolves real dilemmas, such as remote executive assistant Janette, who eliminated acute work misery by joining a co-working community once she recognized her distress stemmed from isolation rather than her job duties. As psychologist Susan David notes, emotions should not be categorized as good or bad. Instead, viewing feelings as informative data offers vital clues that help clarify core needs and steer individuals toward healthier life choices.
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